TikTok is a very special place where you can learn so much about so many different things, and over the past few weeks the world has been learning about a practise that Mormon teenagers engage in called ‘soaking’.
According to Mormon TikTok, ‘soaking’ is basically penetrative sex without the movement and hip thrusting.
Here’s how it works: you’ve got a couple, the guy inserts his penis into the vagina and… just lies there. He does sweet F.A. letting his dick ‘soak.’ (Did that just change your definitions forever? That’ll be the last time you let your dishes soak without thinking of horny Mormon teens lying awkwardly on top of each other).
It’s basically a way to get around pre-marital sex, something that is considered sinful within the Mormon religion.
“There’s so many insane, and wild aspects of the Mormon religion,” explains SBS Editor Mark Mariano.
He’s an ex-Mormon and says if Mormons have sex before marriage they won’t get to experience the full glory of the afterlife party with god.
And you’ll probably be shamed by the church and your community.
Basically, it’s a loophole for Mormons to satisfy their sex needs without sinning…. As strange as that seems.
If you’re thinking ‘Hang on? Why not just invite a mate over to jump on the bed and help the couple ‘soaking’ get some thrusting up in there!?‘
Don’t worry, they’ve already thought of that.
Enter ‘jump humping.’ The Mormon threesome that’s also gone viral on TikTok.
That’s where a friend (or whoever you can get – maybe a stranger walking down your dorm hallway) jumps on the bed while a couple ‘soaks’, the jumping causes the bed to move up and down and therefore mimics ‘real sex’ and allows the soakers to get it on without, again, technically getting it on. It’s group sex like you’d never thought of it before.
So if you’re resorting to friends jumping on the bed, and only being one pelvic thrust away from intercourse, why not just have sex?
Mark says although there’s free agency when you’re a Mormon, there’s incredibly strict guidelines and rules and if you have sex before marriage:
“The consequences are that you won’t be able to experience the ideal spiritual afterlife. And so I think there’s this real element of shame and fear of consequence, that comes with breaking the rules.”
“That’s why Mormon couples are doing all they can finding all these loopholes, to just still experience sex and in a certain way that’s still deemed ‘God friendly’, or that is still deemed religion and Mormon friendly. But I wish it wasn’t that way. I wish that wasn’t the case. And I just wished more couples could explore their sexuality in more fruitful ways.”
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Mark left the Mormon church when he was 14 years old and so he says he’d only learnt about ‘soaking’ and ‘jump humping’ a few months ago but he’s not that surprised it happens.
"It was very bewildering. But I also wasn’t surprised, because there are so many elements of that religion and of Mormonism that are just so wacky, that are just so strange, that are just not conventional."
Although there’s a Mormon community in Australia, Mark says the practise of ‘soaking’ and ‘jump humping’ are probably more common in fundamentalist Mormon communities in America.
“I obviously don’t want to speak on behalf of the whole religion, but I’m assuming that there is a very big vast difference between Australian Mormonism and American Mormonism in the sense that Mormonism began in America. And so in its travels, I’m sure different things were adopted and different things were tweaked along the way.”
But he says it’s really hard to know how common it actually is, because there’s so much secrecy around sex within the Mormon church.
Real conversations about sex and sexuality are never had, so people end up doing things like ‘soaking.’
That shame that Mark is talking about, was something he experienced growing up.
Within the Mormon church, being gay or queer is condemned.
"There was a time when I was just so ashamed."
“Queerness and things like masturbation, things like porn, and all that stuff were so demonized within this space and within this environment. And that can have a really harmful effect on a person and that can have a really, really damaging effect on someone.”
So as a gay teenager, Mark decided to yeet the church so he could fully be himself.
Mark Mariano says he’s been able to fully embrace his sexuality since leaving the Mormon church.
“And so I’m really grateful that upon uncoupling from the church, I was exposed to the internet, to really valuable resources, and really realistic aspects of sex and sexuality that I didn’t see while I was developing as a person and going through puberty.”
“I wouldn’t be where I am if I hadn’t left the church.”
As someone who has left the church and been able to learn and explore all these things, Mark says he wishes there were more opportunities for others to have the same freedoms.
“I think there’s no consequences and there’s no danger to liking sex, wanting sex before and after marriage, during marriage, however you feel it. Sex is the natural thing. Sex is just a part of who we are.”
“I encourage you to open your purview a little and explore this world that has been handed to you and explore the bounds outside of it.
It doesn’t matter who you are, sex is f*cking fascinating – literally. And we’re all going to be always finding ways to be having it.
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